Startropics, or "The one in which we explore how useful a yo-yo is as a weapon."

A boy - armed with a yo-yo - sets off on an island-hopping adventure to save his uncle from aliens. As goofy as a premise it may sound, it makes for an interesting game.

Startropics was an adventure game released for he Nintendo Entertainment System in 1989. It's one of the more memorable games of its time for both its good gameplay and its odd back story. It combines RPG elements with a core action-platforming game that sucks you in to the game.

You play Mike, a teenager from Seattle. After receiving a letter from his Uncle Steve, an archaeologist studying some ancient ruins in his laboratory in the south Pacific. When Mike arrives at C-Island, he learns from the local chief that Dr. J, as they call Mike's uncle, had been kidnapped and that monsters had begun to infest the local islands. Mike, in a fit of either bravery or insanity, takes it upon himself to venture out into the islands to find his uncle. The chief, in turn, decides to arm you with among the least probably video game weapons of all time, a yo-yo. We're dealing with a responsible bunch here, aren't we?

The over-world map and town maps work a lot like the basic RPG of the era works. You can talk to people, wander around and so on. The game really begins when you head into various tunnels and dungeons and it turns into a top-down action platformer. At the end of the first area, you pick up a yellow mini-sub named Sub-C is your mode of transportation as you visit the rest of the game's islands.

The topic of combat brings us to one of the more famous aspects of the game - your primary weapon. The yo-yo. It's, well, a yo-yo. It's a short-range weapon, unlimited use weapon with which you hit your enemies As the game goes forward, you'll pick up a couple upgrades to your yo-yo, but that will be quite a while in the game. I'm not entirely sure how effective a child's toy would be against slugs or rats or snakes, but in Startropics, fights them off quite well.

Aside from the yo-yo and its later upgrades, you'll be able to pick up various special weapons and items in each of the levels. Aside from the quest-relevant event items you'll pick up, there are two major categories of usable items. Support items, such as medicine, can be carried with you between levels, and weapons, which have a limited number of usages and vanish when you leave an area. Some of the temporary weapons are more useful than others and can kill enemies that would be difficult to yo-yo to death.

The levels are twisty, monster-filled tunnels. The ground is either open areas you can move around or tiles which can only be jumped on to. Tiles can contain switches that reveal paths that allow you to get items or continue to a previously blocked area.

At the end of most levels, you'll find a boss. Each one has its own gimmick. The bosses can be quite difficult to defeat and often it's not a matter of pummeling the boss into submission to overcome them. Many levels will have boss fights where you must do specific things to switches or other tiles in the room to win. Combined with the inability to attack in the air and the lack of diagonal movement, the the game can reach moments of controller-smashing frustration.

Overall, though, Startropics was a good game. It had a quirky aesthetic, a good sense of humor, and it was a fairly original plot for its time. In spite of its flaws, it's an enjoyable experience. The game is available on the Wii's Virtual Console and is worth a look if you haven't played the game before. Interestingly, Nintendo was forced to rename the yo-yo the "Island Star" for copyright reasons for the Virtual Console release. But we all know what Mike is really smacking those rats with, don't we?

Super Mario Bros. 3, or "How does a raccoon tail make Mario more aerodynamic?"

Some people love it. Some people... Love it? Face it. Super Mario Bros. 3 is a hard game not to like, assuming you're into 2D platform games. It is well-paced, takes you through a variety of environments, has a bunch of useful power-ups and doesn't fall all over itself to wedge in some sort of epic story.

The first time many gamers saw SMB3 was in the movie The Wizard. People far more talented than myself have already ripped that movie apart, but in short, it was a giant advertisement for Nintendo. Even a 10-year-old going to that movie saw it for what it was and didn't really care. All they cared about was the games.

In SMB3, you play as Mario... Or Luigi if you got stuck with the second controller. You're a plumber in a world full of walking fungi, anthropomorphic turtles and pipes scattered across the landscape for no adequately explored reasons.

King Koopa has sent his children to steal seven magic wands from seven kings of the various countries that apparently make up the Mushroom Kingdom. And for good measure, all the kings have been turned into animals. Where the Koopalings came from is anyone's guess. We may be better off not knowing who their mother was.

The heroes set off around the world, visiting the various themed lands of the Mushroom Kingdom. And after freeing the last king, you find out that, shock of shocks, Princess Toadstool has been kidnapped... Again. So the heroes head for Bowser's base of operations where you eventually face off with King Koopa and save the princess.

The levels in the game are accessed via a world map with various paths which all take you to your eventual goal of the level's castle. The map allows you to skip levels if you so desire as well as act somewhat strategically as to which path on the map will be open to you. Also, it gives you access to various special areas – some stationary and some which spawn either randomly or when certain conditions are met.

The selection of power-up items to help you on your way has greatly increased since the days of the original Super Mario Bros. You have your traditional mushrooms, fire flowers and stars. New to the game is the leaf, which lets Mario grow a raccoon tail, allowing Mario to fly if you get a running start. Don't ask me what about adding ears and a tail to a pudgy, Itallian plumber makes him aerodynamic enough to fly. Just go with it.

There are also three suits added to the game. The tanuki suit (Gives you all the powers of the racoon tail, plus lets you turn into an invincible statue for a few seconds,) the frog suit (Swim and hop,) and the hammer brothers suit (Lets you throw hammers at enemies, crouch down and be immune to fireballs, and just look like an all around bad ass.) One of the better changes to power ups is that you can also get them outside of the levels on the world map and store them up for when you'll need them. In fact, most of the suits are only found in large supply on the special bonus areas or mini games on the world map. There are also several power ups that effect the world map directly such as the hammer for breaking blocks on the world map. Last, but not least on the power up front, is the warp whistle. they allow you to bypass entire worlds.

The worlds Mario fights through are varied and fun. My personal favorite is Giant Land, where many of the enemies and obstacles are grown to huge proportions. Don't ask me why, but seeing Mario hop on top of Koopas that are four or five times his size is a few kinds of cool.

Aside from the normal level areas, the maps also have fortresses. Each one is controlled by a guy named Boom-Boom. He'll move around in predictable patterns and sometimes his arms turn into wings and he flies around. No, I don't know why he does that. I've always assumed that the Boom-Booms were some kind of creepy experiment Bowser set up gone horribly wrong. Or he's the Koopalings' "special" brother. Either way.

At the end of each of the first seven worlds, you board a Koopa brand airship and advance through a forced scrolling level which generally has no enemies present, but plenty of cannons and lifts. The ships look as though King Koopa's airship designers were really in to log cabins. Or Bowser bought out a few lumber yards before launching his conquest. At the end of each airship, you face off against one of the Koopalings - Bowser's offspring of indeterminate origin. They mostly employ unique attacks and attack patterns. But after you bonk them on the head 3 times, it's all over. The airship inexplicably disintegrates around you and you plummet to the ground, pilfered wand in hand.

In 2 player mode, Mario and Luigi alternate levels, leading to great fun when you can stick your friend with a level you hate. Also, it features the ability to play your friend in a version of the original Mario Bros. arcade game. Honestly, any time I tried to play someone else, we'd always end up ignoring the main game and try and screw each other over in the mini game.

SMB 3 has been ported to the Super Nintendo as part of the Super Mario All-Stars cart, to the Game Boy Advanced and is available on the Wii virtual console. Its worth tracking down if you're one of the five people who haven't played it before. And the rest of you? Go play it again. Really. I'll wait.